Helena Keeffe asked people to write speeches for president George W. Bush that would convince the American people that he's had a change of heart about, well, everything. Five students ages 7 to 10 from an elementary school in San Francisco accepted her invitation and here's what they came up with. My favorite quote? "I know I have been a bad president and I have come to the conclusion that that it is because like Dick Chaney I have eaten too many twinkies." Touche.